Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
Your message has been received by an unknown user. Picture verification required.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?