Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
