Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
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