Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize