If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Randomize