Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
