My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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