I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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