oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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