Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila