FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
