It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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