I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
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I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
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That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." π ππ·
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I love you.
Bad choice
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