I forgot how hot balto sounded
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
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