Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
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I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
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Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
We smell like vodka and hangover
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