i need an iv and a liver transplant
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
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