8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
