her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
I think my nap took me to another dimension
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
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