and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.