the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
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i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
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In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..