Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
you inspire me to be a worse person
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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