Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high