If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
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Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
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Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.