This dress was meant to end up on your floor
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
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