I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Please don't give away my fajitas
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Randomize
