mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
But break dance skills will only take you so far
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...