There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
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