just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
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