I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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