Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
15 Things That Could NEVER Happen Anywhere But the South
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
15 Times “Flight of the Conchords” Made You Feel Better About Being a Twenty-Something
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast