I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize