tell your sister to shave her snatch
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
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Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome