i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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