Texts From Last Night

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  (281): View more from Texas

  I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent

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  (281): I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent http://tfl.nu/311d
  Replies (37) Good night (3109) Bad night (988) Order T-Shirt
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...

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  (502): i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is... http://tfl.nu/n91t
  Replies (40) Good night (4243) Bad night (560) Order T-Shirt
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  (620): View more from Kansas

  Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.

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  (620): Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old. http://tfl.nu/papu
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  (718): View more from New York

  We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.

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  (718): We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate. http://tfl.nu/1mwi
  Replies (14) Good night (1110) Bad night (4493) Order T-Shirt
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion

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  (651): The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion http://tfl.nu/8885
  Replies (12) Good night (2081) Bad night (4017) Order T-Shirt
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u

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  (401): Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u http://tfl.nu/jall
  Replies (21) Good night (4054) Bad night (860) Order T-Shirt
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  He asked if I wanted to "hang out"

  (410): View more from Maryland

  A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"

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  (410): He asked if I wanted to "hang out" (410): A verb which here means "do lines off my dick" http://tfl.nu/6cb5
  Replies (9) Good night (3109) Bad night (1049)
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient

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  (479): Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient http://tfl.nu/pvik
  Replies (4) Good night (699) Bad night (1273) Order T-Shirt
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  (806): View more from Texas

  Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.

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  (806): Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes. http://tfl.nu/kfeu
  Replies (3) Good night (1295) Bad night (438) Order T-Shirt
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.

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  (937): she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest. http://tfl.nu/xty4
  Replies (2) Good night (1214) Bad night (334) Order T-Shirt
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  (515): View more from Iowa

  He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.

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  (515): He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head. http://tfl.nu/6i8v
  Replies (0) Good night (272) Bad night (551) Order T-Shirt
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.

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  (608): On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke. http://tfl.nu/f19p
  Replies (18) Good night (2750) Bad night (265) Order T-Shirt
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.

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  (812): I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest. http://tfl.nu/mbi2
  Replies (5) Good night (939) Bad night (228) Order T-Shirt
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  (425): View more from Washington

  I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.

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  (425): I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off. http://tfl.nu/u9dg
  Replies (3) Good night (445) Bad night (159) Order T-Shirt
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  (214): View more from Texas

  Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?

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  (214): Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend? http://tfl.nu/qooe
  Replies (1) Good night (539) Bad night (146) Order T-Shirt

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