he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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