so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize