Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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