Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize