Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
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All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
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Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra