oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
