I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize