if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
These Attractive Criminals Took Sexy Mugshots That Made Them Famous
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.