Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
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