Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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