So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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