Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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