yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
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