That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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