his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize