3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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